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The Domestiphobic’s Guide to Cat Ownership
Let me start off by stating that, technically, the above title is incorrect because ownership implies some measure of control or ability to exert your will over the subject in question. When it comes...
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Only a Flesh Wound
You know that feeling when you love someone like crazy, but you’re embarrassed to be seen with him/her in public? Don’t tell me you don’t. ’Cause I know you do. Hell, I’ve been that person to someone...
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Eating Cream-Laden Cotton Balls? It’s My Favorite Thing!
Remember how I told you that I could ask my dogs if they wanted to get a colonoscopy today, and they’d probably respond with, “Hell yes, that’s our favorite thing!“? Remember how I told you that...
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Centerfold
So apparently this is what happens when I’m dumb enough to leave piles of clean, folded laundry on the sofa. And apparently Capone must think he’s part bird since he created himself a little nest. And...
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Mean Things Come in Small Packages
I don’t know what’s going on with the Universe right now, but I’m guessing it has something to do with the tides and the moon and waxing and waning and the frogs in the pond in front of my house...
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I’m Pretty Sure My Dog Tried to Drown Me and Other Reasons I Probably Should...
While my sister was here for an impromptu visit last week, we quite frequently took our 4 — count ‘em, four – combined mutts down to the lake near our house for some much-needed energy expenditure. On...
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On Wiggly Mutts and Puppy Butts
I had a dog. I’ve pretty much always had a dog. First, there was Muffin. Muffin had a white triangle on her head. She was a gift to my brother right before I was born, undoubtedly intended to lessen...
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Crap. I Guess I’m One of Those Moms.
Yesterday afternoon, a veterinarian laughed at me. Yep. Apparently I’m that crazy dog mother who, even though I never dress my dogs in sweaters (or any kind of clothing save the occasional reflective...
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Getting All Scarlett O’Hara on This Day’s Ass.
I’m not going to lie. Yesterday sucked. Not just because I had to say goodbye to Justin. I already knew that was going to suck. But then I also had to say goodbye to my other childhood dog, Lexie. (I...
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It’s Not Like Georges St-Pierre Is Hanging Out In My Back Yard, But Close.
Last Saturday night I had my first Ultimate Fighting Championship experience. Some new friends invited us to their place for a chili cook-off followed by board games and a UFC extravaganza. Our...
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Nips.
I don’t have a real post for you today because many things are happening. First, these: Yep. Apparently breasts grow quite naturally in the grass in my neighborhood. They’re a little lopsided, but...
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Doggie Dilemma: Holiday Boarding.
So I have to drop the mutts off at the kennel today, and I’m filled with all kinds of anxiety. This used to involve a relatively painless 45-minute commute into the country to an adorable little family...
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